February 15th 2014 - Published Fe.15th 2014 in ByRegion newsletter
The Healing Power of Forgiveness- On this Plane and the Other Side
Forgiveness On This Plane
Question :My father-in-law has been at times unkind to me when he has visited over the last few years. I really have no idea why. There is an unexplainable tension between us. It is with the things he says. One time he yelled out (racist epithet) at the tv during the Olympics. I was so shocked that I went upstairs . He learned that I had heard his derogatory comment but he never apologized to me.
One Xmas, he was so drunk at my house he broke a present which my father had given to me for my wedding. He also didn't apologize.
He has said so many hurtful but offhand and unexpected things directed at me.
I have since stopped sharing photos or any emails with him.
I tolerated his presence at my home over the holidays. I've taken my husband to marriage counseling because he didn't defend me. Now we have a good understanding.
What has gone so wrong?
Answer: Forgiving this man is by far the easiest to way to cut the ties . He cannot have his emotional hooks into your energy field if you forgive him. He takes your energy. Do not think he is unaware that he is hurting you. He is one of those people who steals energy-and this is easier to do when the person from whom they are taking is spiritually aware, kind, loving, and compassionate.
A person who steals energy has no direct connection to the Divine. This makes such a being unhappy. The only way they can feel good is to take from one who does have this connection.
Certainly you should protect yourself and your children from this behaviour. It is essential that you have peace in your heart.
Therefore if you forgive your father-in-law it is for your sake, and your husband’s sake, and that of your children.
It is not for his sake. It is just to free you from him.
And you can also ask his guides and angels to open his heart.
Response: The message to forgive my father- in-law so that I can be free is exactly what I needed. I have felt trapped the last several months. Now I know how to be free. I will work hard on forgiving him. I will even try to tell him in person as I know he is looking to visit us again soon. I will try. I know this is very important for my family.
Part Two: Forgiveness on the Other Side
Back Story: a couple is deciding whether to terminate a child with a serious disability
Spirit Baby: Mommy, let me tell you in advance that my identity as a spirit is somewhat different than my expression in one particular body.
Imagine a normal hand-you can imagine it as a child’s hand.
On each fingertip is a photo of a human face.
Maybe there are two or three females, at least two races, and one finger with a photo of a disabled child.
The palm of the hand represents the oversoul. (This is a simplification, as in fact we may have hundreds of lives.)
(switches apparent age to baby form)Mommy, I want you to hear me…both as a baby currently incarnate, and as a spirit with a great many lives.
(older sounding spirit)Each expression of that oversoul is quite different due to heredity, family, gender, social class, physical health. And these different characteristics radically affect the options which that expression will have in the society into which it is born.
Parents have the right and duty to prevent suffering in their children. If a disabled child will not fit in to your family life, and you feel you would not be able to give him unconditional love, then there is no blame and no shame. From me, there is no anger, Mother, if this is the difficult choice you have to make. It frees me to go on to have a healthier life at some future time, a little sooner.
As for me, with my consciousness still on the other side, I know that life on Earth is very hard at the best of times. On the Other Side there is only joy and peace and talk of future opportunities to fulfill a life task.
It is true that even a disabled person can have a life task. For example,they may help others who are their caregivers develop qualities of compassion, caring, forgiveness, patience, and joy in simple things.
On a soul level, I am your child and will continue to be so even if my physical body is not allowed to continue. If this is the decision you need to make there is no blame, no anger. I would stay on a soul level…at the very least I could be an inner child to you, Mommy, reminding you to take time to smell the roses.
As a child with mental and physical disabilities that might be my own orientation, but it would be harder for you to have that time. Also the care of a disabled child is a lifetime task…which tends to fall on the sibling to carry on with.
I could certainly detach my spirit from the body before the procedure so that I would not feel any discomfort-more like a car without a driver crashing, to use an image you might understand.
Please be aware that I am speaking from the point of view of my higher self. It does not mean that an expression with mental disabilities could ever think this way.
Mother: I am very sad and very confused as I am not sure this spirit baby wants to join us. I feel as if we are doing something wrong.
SB: My love for you makes me willing to take on any challenges…but this does not mean that I expect great sacrifices from you, daddy and big sibling. Life is about making choices which work for all concerned-including me, mother.
You are the best mommy I could ask for, and even now, while I am still in your body I am blessed to feel your emotions. ..your love and concern for me. This experience will help me be a better guide/inner child/secret friend, if that is what remains as options.
I love you all, and as you may be aware, I have no control at all over what bodies are provided...I can only decide whether to attach, for the experience, or not. For me there is no pain, emotional or physical, if the particular expression of my oversoul which is a body with huge challenges has a short rather than a long life. It is still an experience, which I thank you for...a learning opportunity to be a part of your family for a while in the physical realm. No life is wasted, mommy.
Mother: I lost a close friend. Is there any message?
Friend: Love is the only thing that matters. Love is the only thing you can take with you to the other side.
It is peaceful here. There is time for reflection, but there is also a lot of work to do.
We will meet again.
If you should happen to meet a child or adult, years from now, who reminds you of me, remember not to be fooled by gender or race or anything like that. Energy stays though, energy is the same life after life, when you have really known and loved someone. A part of me will always be here on the other side to welcome you home.
I know you are going through a very difficult time- I look in on you sometimes. Try to remember that joy will return. You have a beautiful child. Your child needs you to take care of yourself. So rest as much as you can, meditate and realise that there is a bigger picture which we cannot fathom while we are still trapped in the very slow, heavy energy of Earth.
I am free now from all the pain and suffering. The instant I left my body the pain was gone-it was quite amazing.
And no, I did not learn all the secrets of the universe at once! But I realised that there is a far bigger picture than we can ever grasp while we are still in the Earth body.
You are very deeply loved.
The baby you are carrying has chosen you and will stay with you all your life in some form. You will not lose him -I know that seems hard to understand, but do you think you have truly lost me? Am I not still a part of you? Any time we love someone truly, they are a part of our souls forever-through future lifetimes to come. Love is the ONLY thing which death does not change -the only thing we can take with us to the other side, and into future lives.
Please believe that sorrow fades. Joy will come in the morning.
Article By Christine Nightingale
Nightingale Natural Healing
72 Newbridge Crescent
Brampton, Ontario L6S 4B3
Canada