CJ Martes: Articles
LOOKING WITHIN: the spiritual gift of self love
Learning to love ourselves is the greatest spiritual gift of all!

October 04th 2016 - From the time I was a little girl, I could feel a constant flow of energy move into this third dimensional world through me. From time to time, I would hear an ethereal voice echo in my ears and blow unconditional love through my heart. Soon I began to realize that an angel lay deep within me, yearning to share a deep spiritual love with mankind. I felt sure that I had been born into this world to be a gift to others and share this blessing. Of course at the age of ten, I was not sure what it took to be a gift, other than giving to people whenever I could.

After I became an adult, I embarked on what I would call my selfless journey. It took really no time at all to feel drained and resentful. I soon withdrew from my mission reflecting that I had become nothing that resembled the child of light I had hoped to be. I eventually realized, after much heartache and tribulation, that I was missing the one vital ingredient necessary to spread this gift of unconditional love-self love.

I have reflected for a long time about this concept of self love. We grow on this earth, cycling from childhood to adulthood hearing people tell us that it is important to love ourselves. This often becomes confused as we are taught to live in direct opposition to this. We also receive the message from society that we should be selfless and should care for others to the extreme expense of ourselves. This type of love for others is still a beautiful thing because our spiritual motivations behind this type of giving are very pure. Within each one of us is a heart of light with the deep ability to care for others in a non-judgmental, pure and enlightened way. We should certainly give to others from deep within, but self love must come first.

We learn at an early age how to take care of ourselves and survive on this planet. We are all born with instincts already built in that help us live a good life. These different mechanisms inside each of us are crucial and help protect us from harm. We grow as we overcome and adapt to our third dimensional reality as life throws us into situations that we must learn to endure. We learn by jumping at life’s opportunities, often falling as we make different choices on our journey. This cycle of growth is our basic process.

This simple process can also teach us to live exclusively through the lives of others. As we experience life’s trials, it becomes increasingly important to us how well we learn and how others view what we are doing. We begin to worry about the judgments of others and thus begins our quest for acceptance and approval from those around us. Many times our need for approval mixes with our spiritual need to give love purely and completely. As a result, many of us give and give to others without a thought for ourselves and our own needs.

It is inherent to our spirits to love others, yet if we learn to sacrifice or martyr ourselves in the process we soon lose our way. This was not the purpose of our creation. It was not that we should share our light and care for others to become a martyr. Instead we should recognize within ourselves the pure expression of beauty and love that is true to our higher purpose. This inner beauty is the radiating, healing light that becomes the true gift to mankind. If we value and love ourselves completely our love and beauty radiate from our hearts and souls extending beyond the confines of our physical vehicle. We become the greatest gift of love and healing that we could ever externally create. This gift of love to our human brothers and sisters then extends to all living things in the universe. Before we are able to move forward in our evolution as third dimensional human beings we must integrate this lesson on love.

It is interesting that this concept would be so mystifying. It eluded me for quite some time. I can recall starting at the very beginning of my journey, experiencing life after life of lessons. I fell a lot more times than anyone could possibly count. It was a gradual process where I eventually began to understand that I was valuable for more than just my good deeds. I finally could understand the value in being a child of light who is part of the unconditional love of the universe. After this realization, I began to experience a new feeling of joy. It was new because since childhood the trade off had been to experience terrible pain when I selflessly took care of others.

As I started my integration process, I had to be consciously aware of being self loving and say, Okay now I should do something nice for myself. It seemed silly at the time to make a point of this, but I noticed as I began to pursue this issue, it became easier. I soon felt freer to express all my feelings not only internally but to others as well. I was able to eventually free myself from my constant fear and victimization. For example, I used to remark that no one would buy me flowers, feeling sad and insecure. Flowers made me happy and I could not understand why others who loved me could not see that. I one day decided to buy them for myself and through that simple act, brought the joy to myself I had wanted from others. I now purchase flowers frequently. I love surrounding myself with fresh fragrant blossoms on a weekly basis. It no longer matters to me whether anyone buys me flowers because I can now give this gift to myself. These types of exercises begin to grow exponentially from there. Random acts of kindness are wonderful, but are truly infinite if the recipient of your love is you. Until we incorporate this infinite love within ourselves, we are unable to give to others in the way we would like.

To be able to fully integrate this concept is certainly at the core and heart of our journey. This is the beginning of our release and freedom from pain here on earth. When we truly value ourselves as people our light begins to shine, no longer covered up by doubt of ourselves or fear of others judgments. We really become an outward expression of who we are. We are infinite in our joy. We shine with the pure light and love of the universe. If you look around, you can spot a person that has integrated self love. They are happy and radiate this genuine pure light that explodes from inside their souls. They literally glow.

Self love is a complete and perfect expression of your higher self. From the time of your creation, you are one with all living things. We eventually separate from this connection as we embrace our humanity. To complete our journey, we must undo the residual effects of the lessons we endure on earth and incorporate this concept as part of our a gradual process towards enlightenment. As we progress in our lives we eventually must go within to become whole again.

I have watched the healing grow throughout my life after I went within to uncover the unconditional love of my heart and soul. It became a true wonder to me as it spread purely to the people I wanted to touch in my life. I watched in joy and triumph as I became the gift to others that I had dreamed of. The true healer inside of me soon followed as well. I also realized just how powerful each one of us can be in the light of unconditional self love.

This powerful light can only continue to grow. It starts with a single person who honors themselves enough to begin loving, first giving to themselves and then reaching out to others. Then the love expands from there as each person initially touched by the self love of one, reach out in self love to others. We then become linked together, like a chain of light reaching to the horizon. This is the very chain of unconditional love that can change the world by truly sharing the gift and loving embrace of our creation.

A powerful spiritual teacher, consciousness expert and innovative thinker, CJ Martes has spent the past two decades touching the lives of thousands around the world. As one of the world's leading Akashic Field Theorists and founder of Akashic Field TherapyT (AFT), she unites penetrating scientific insight and ancient knowledge to help individuals resolve traumas and realize their full mental, spiritual and physical potential. She can be contacted by visiting her website: cjmartes.com or by calling (800) 604-9967.


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